Sometimes I wonder if I'm inadvertently avoiding my calling. On one hand, I seem to be waiting for something - or someone - to happen so life can start. For example, I'd really like to get married before I head out on the mission field. I'd rather not go off to a foreign country all by my lonesome. And, inevitably, God is using this time in my life to prepare me for what He has next.
At the same time, I can't help but thinking that I'm just passing my days doing work that doesn't inspire me simply because it's comfortable. There aren't a lot of risks involved in collecting co-pays, answering telephones, or filing charts. Am I avoiding "the next thing" because it's easier to just stick with what I've got? Am I supposed to be so bold as to drop everything and fly around the world to carry the gospel to a remote jungle tribe? Surely God wouldn't advocate such a haphazard plan, but I find myself wondering if I need to be doing something more (and if so, where the heck do I find the time?).
Ugh. Life is so complicated and God is so abstract sometimes. Now and then, I wish I was 2 again....
1 comment:
I hear ya, sis! I wonder the same thing sometimes! Keep knocking and I can assure you that the door will open. He promised us that! When it's time, I think you will know and understand.
Love you so much!
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